triastra

Geometry and Beauty in everything

2012-02-12T15:05:00.000-06:00

I don't really have anything to say.

I'm a dinosaur
I'm a sea monster
I'm a dolphin

You should see it from afar

2012-02-02T21:44:00.000-06:00

A day to finish a bird

2012-01-29T15:45:00.000-06:00

Sort of finished this mixed media piece Nate asked me to do. Well, he asked me to draw a bird and gave me a book which had a bird on the cover as help when I told him I have to look at a real thing to draw it. I tried to stay true to its bird-ness, and because of that I think it has a personality.

Snow days and We're Married

2012-01-21T11:23:00.002-06:00

Hi! Here I am, writing a blog post though I'm not really interested in doing so. I need to write, should write every now and then though. I'm not a college kid who has a bunch of time to record every woeful day in my journal. I used to write SO MUCH. I went back and read through a lot of it too and it was really insightful at times, trying to figure out myself and those around me. I guess I've just been hibernating lately. And I've been a bit in denial at how different life is in the winter.

And then SNOW hit here. It was pretty exciting because it's really not common. A lot of outlying areas had some real issues like power outages and tree branches breaking and falling on people and cars. I had a lot of fun watching the local news. When it all first hit on Wednesday, the news was on from 4am until I don't know - late at night. They had people out driving around, broadcasting in their cars as they reported on road conditions and talked with local residents and law enforcement. I found it interesting how the news station, the police, and other govt agencies coordinated in communicating what was going on. I was really impressed. At one point the head meteorologist got a University of Washington professor in atmospheric sciences on the phone and discussed the accuracy of the prediction models and how they changed.

My office was closed Wednesday and Thursday so I worked from home and gazed out the window at the snow, taking brief breaks to walk out into the front hallway in my houseslippers to see what was going on out on the streets - where I snapped this pic.

I essentially had to take over our whole living space to work.

We didn't go sledding or anything like that, we simply walked around a little just to get out. The snow here is pretty different than in other places of the country (I learned about it from the news). It's really wet and heavy. Walking around in it reminded me of walking through silky sand. It wasn't going anywhere. Finally yesterday the temps got up near 40 and it started raining full force. I was the only one who made it into the office, aside from one of the principals who only stayed for an hour. It was fun trekking to and from work in my rubber knee boots, which are part of my field gear. I felt sorry for all the people who were wearing regular shoes having to daintily walk through huge piles of slushy snow at crosswalks. I felt so proud and indestructible clomping through whatever I wanted in my boots. YEAH.

Beside the snow happenings I want to let the blog world know that Nate and I got married. We eloped in our own town, having a civil ceremony in a judge's office overlooking Puget Sound in the high rise Justice Center downtown. We went after I got off work one day - well it was Tuesday, October 18th to be precise - and were pleasantly surprised to find that we got to go through the whole thing looking out at an amazing view of the sound. It had been sunny all day so the dusky tones of sunset were starting to show. It was just so cool. And there was no God or Religious stuff in what the judge said, just right-on shit like 'you must nurture each other as individuals in addition to your relationship.' Our witnesses were two West Seattle natives Nate befriended working at Enterprise - they were car preps - and definitely the coolest people he met working for that fraternity pyramid scheme company. After the ceremony, we all walked back to our apartment and shared some Carlo Rossi wine and chocolate cake from Whole Foods.

The next day I went to work as usual, then we took the Amtrak down to spend a couple days in Portland for our honeymoon. We really love that place. So many breweries, great public transportation, and a smaller town feel than Seattle. Really laid back and chill. We stayed at a pretty damn nice hotel, Hotel Modera, which I would definitely recommend to anyone. The prices weren't ridiculous and the design and quality of experience staying there was top notch. There's a FANTASTIC restaurant attached to the hotel where we enjoyed some of the best food. We seriously felt like royalty. What was also great was that we were doing this all on our own, no one except our witnesses knew we got married. It was a secret that we relished in, but felt free to tell those we encountered during our stay in Portland. We didn't take any pictures to really document the event but I did complete a pretty cool drawing in my Disney Halloween coloring book on the train trip down and in the hotel room.

To commemorate our wedding, we got matching tattoos on the inside of our left wrists in between visits to the Deschutes Brewery. Nate designed them. Neither of us were into the whole ring idea and that would cut in to the secret aspect of it all anyways. Even after we were back in Seattle with our colleagues and friends, no one thought our matching tattoos meant anything. It took like 2 full months for our little tattoos to heal though, that's some sensitive skin there on the wrist! Nate didn't seem to experience much pain at all while he was getting his done, he chatted freely with the tattoo artists in the room as if nothing was going on. But when it was my turn it REALLY FUCKING HURT. All I could do was sit there in silence willing my zen state so that I would stay calm and not move. The only other place that's hurt worse to get tattooed on was my ankle.

We told our families and then friends the first weekend of this month - January. So we waited 2 and a half months before 'coming out.' Why? Many many reasons. We didn't feel like it was anyone's business, first of all. We felt it should be a private event between two people. And also, getting married is kind of a weird thing. We wanted to wait awhile until we got used to the whole idea before having to talk to others about it. I personally didn't want anything to do with planning a real wedding or any of that. We were engaged for like a month. We didn't want people to feel like they needed to shower us with gifts or talk to us about our decision to get married before or immediately after we did it. We're also really far away from our families and any friends we would want to be present for such a thing. It just made sense. I'm keeping my last name because neither of us felt comfortable with me changing it, and we're not having kids.

So now you guys know. Nate and I are mates for life - until one of us dies.

Grown-up inner dialogue

2012-01-09T14:38:00.001-06:00

Unfortunately I'm spending this Monday at home from work, sick with a stomach/respiratory bug. Very similar to allergic symptoms I experience. Makes me wonder if there's some new allergen in the air - the seasons in Seattle are different, a lot of plants start blooming very early. Anyhow, that's what it feels like. Blech.

But it means I've gotten to read a little in a book I just bought called Creative, Inc.: The Ultimate Guide to Running a Successful Freelance Business. Already I find it inspiring and feel I'm moving in the right direction. Here's an excerpt I just read that inspired and comforted me:

"As you begin this endeavor, embrace your newness to the freelance game. Don't get discouraged by how green you are, and don't let the achievements of others deflate you. As you flip through design annuals, scan through photography blogs, or check out online reels, you may envy established freelancers working with big-name clients or ogle work and wonder, 'Why didn't I think of that?' Remember that at one time all these creatives were in your shoes. Take their success stories as inspiration. As a new freelancer, you'll probably have to pay your dues - possibly by compromising your vision or accepting uninspiring projects just to pay the bills. The road to a profitable freelance career doing cutting-edge work may not always be the swiftest, but if you keep building your body of work with an emphasis on quality, prized clients with meaningful commissions will soon be knocking on your door."

Something else I realized is that in the past my attitude has been, "oh this book or this article doesn't apply completely to my situation, it's useless." I had to stop myself and rewrite my inner dialogue and say, "Well that doesn't matter, it's all research. Don't be so quick to discard helpful information on the subject." I am pretty darn good in my job as a scientific researcher, so I should be able to apply those skills to this subject, be a bit more professional about it instead of acting like a bratty kid looking for a one-stop-shop to get all my questions answered and all my needs met. Because that's not gonna happen. It's research right now. Time to put on my researchers hat and put the emotional fragile artist hat to the side. It doesn't suit me anymore, I've outgrown it. Thank goodness.

Material World

2012-01-08T03:37:00.001-06:00

I decided the best way to proceed with my art career is to treat myself as if I'm a solo musician starting out. What would a musician do? They'd just go out and play, take that time out of their day. So I'm going to continue giving my art away to people who want it until something changes. I realize the business side of it but let's not get ahead of ourselves. Just DO it, ya know?

I finished my first drawing since being in our new apartment and a friend I met on Twitter asked how much I would charge for something, that she like my style. I admitted not knowing yet, that I hadn't taken payment for something yet. I'm gonna just send it to her, already have her address. Because that's what it is - it's connecting and completing the 'artistic transaction' (a completely dork way of putting it) in whatever way you can. I no longer desire to do art for it to sit in my house. It's grown up, it needs to get out and play. My oeurve is like my kid or something.

I have to mention that the above has been inspired by the film Martin Scorsese directed called "George Harrison: Living in the Material World," which I've watched twice now since Friday night. I never dug the Beatles, I see them as an important invention like the piano, but to learn about the people who did it is infinitely interesting. And so this one's about George and so of course there are no words to describe him, only music.

Why I Hate Coldplay

2012-01-06T23:02:00.000-06:00

I realized why I absolutely hate Coldplay now other than the fact that their music's gone down the tubes. The reason I even examined this was I've had unreasonably harsh reactions to them on multiple occasions. Which struck me as odd when I stopped to think about it because I used to fucking LOVE them. So intensely. 2 boys ruined them for me.

Item 1 is a boy I will call BL. He actually introduced me to Coldplay by giving me a copy of their first album Parachutes back when they were only really making peeps in the U.S. A bit later we were supposed to go see them in concert in Atlanta when only this first album was out. A VERY RARE TIME. But then he decided to be a huge asshole when he realized we weren't meant to be more than friends and by lack of attention screwed me out of going (i.e. never called, never finalized the plans I was counting on to make the trip with a whole group of us and go). He knew it was a big deal to me. We both knew seeing Coldplay live back then was a big deal and he fucked me out of it.

Item 2 is a boy I will call TA. He wasn't so much into Coldplay when we were together but I played it a lot. I fondly recall that their 3rd album XY came out on my fucking birthday. I fell in love with the song "Talk" and he tolerated my listening of it. He tolerated when I told him I thought of him when I listened to that song (probably because our relationship was turning into more of a friendship at that point) but after we broke up for the last time I distinctly remember him making sure to tell me of how he (hamming it up, feigning a broken heart) heard "Talk" come on during an art class or at his work or something and he almost couldn't bear to hear it. Beware, reader, it may sound sad on his part but he really was just hamming it up. He didn't give a shit.

And then Coldplay started putting out shitty albums.

Year of the zig zagging floaty cloud

2012-01-05T23:30:00.001-06:00

Been reading a lot of blog posts from various people talking about 2011 in review and making goals for 2012. I don't really dig it. Yes, I made myself go back through and read every one of my posts from 2011, watch all the videos, etc. I did it because I wanted to be done with it and move on and know that I don't have to go backwards again anytime soon. Goals are fantastic, don't get me wrong, but I sort of feel like goals can be tricky. It's good to have motivation toward something but to put a time frame on the result is limiting, putting it in a box. I've been super motivated towards a singular goal before, sure. Looking back, the only time I've really had that drive, it was related to employment or schooling. Well, I was pretty fucking motivated to find a mate back in 2009 and I got that, but I also just *felt* my time had come and I was gonna fucking GRAB it. So I think successful goals result from having the ability to sense what's coming over the horizon and running towards it instead of zig-zagging around like someone running away from an alligator. Being broke and really stressed out will either break you or motivate you to do something the fuck else. I'm not broke or stressed out.

So I'm not making any goals for 2012. I know what I'd like to do and I have an idea of where my life is heading, but I'm not in a situation that calls for serious soul searching. I'm not going through a really drastic life change - I did that last year with the move out to Seattle. So now that I'm settled here I'll float like a cloud. A walking cloud though, cuz that cloud will have feet on the ground. A happy cloud. I feel pretty protected and secure in my life. I'm not some naive putz though, I think about death A LOT. The certainty of death is a good way to keep your life in focus, not the start of a new year.

Calmly

2012-01-02T21:22:00.000-06:00

My lesson of the day has been: Staying calm and being very patient will make any errand-running go much smoother. Especially if you cultivate this mind set before setting out.

Today I needed to go to the grocery store, and possibly Walgreens to get everything I needed. Both walking distance but the amount of stuff I needed to get was a bit of a challenge without a car and without anyone else to help (Nate went to work). I will also say that a good backpack makes errand running SO MUCH easier. If I even think there's a slight possibility I will be buying or picking up anything I will wear my backpack (a fantastic Kelty daypack I got on Amazon for like $50) and it's almost never a bad decision. I've started to take grocery shopping (above a small shop) more seriously.

#1 Make a list. Take as much time as you need to do this.
#2 Dress comfortably. I had to strike a deal with myself that I was only going to change my pants but that the shirt I was wearing was staying.
#3 Check the weather and be prepared for it. It was raining outside with no chance of stopping, as my weather app told me.
#4 Have a plan for transporting the stuff you buy. I had my backpack and one fabric shopping bag - the bulk of my items were for my backpack and the rest I would put in the fabric bag or hold because they were too unruly and large (10 pack of toilet paper).
#5 Wait until you're ready to go. I let my thoughts slowly gather, I took my time. I knew this had to be done and I would do it.
#6 Walk slowly and put yourself in a bubble where the frenzy of everything else around you will melt away as it approaches you. I'm telling you this works - only if you take the time to center yourself and realize you have the CHOICE of whether or not to get worked up about it.

I decided the way I approached my grocery shop is going to be my attitude this year. There is a distinct possibility that I will need to have my ducks in a row relatively soon so that I can be commissioned to do paintings and sell my art. In the past I've let myself get all worked up about it, that the business world and money is something I don't understand. But now I'm older and I've realized I'm quite capable of doing more on my own. I've always been good at record-keeping and money, and I have an eye for detail and interest in the law and regulations. When I searched my brain thinking of someone I knew who had what it took to do these sorts of things on my behalf I realized I fit every characteristic I was looking for. And so I'm consciously deciding that this time I'm not going to let it all overwhelm me. I'm going to take my time, gather the information I need until I feel ready, and move forward. I'm going to stay calm. I can do this. It's freeing to realize that choosing patience over frustration is well within our powers as mature human beings.

At the End and at the Beginning

2011-12-31T20:32:00.000-06:00

The heart of the matter is, why do I say what I say on this blog? How come I don't have the traditional markings of a traditional person? Why don't I mark my successes by the parties and events I go to? Why don't I have kids? Why don't I even want kids and why are there some things I have to even question as to why I don't care about them? It's nice to see the contrast, to compare to something. I think the human experience is so deep. We are all comprised of so much that I often feel as if anything conveyed online will only ever be facsimile which is why many times I decide not to even bother. I care about the things that cannot be expressed in words. I'm not good at words. Sometimes I use two spaces after a period and sometimes only one. I'm not consistent.

Watching Cold Mountain again. It's such a poetic movie, probably because my experience of the content is greatly enriched by having read the book. Sitting here on the couch realizing that, and relishing it made me realize that's the stuff I care about.

"If it were enough just to stand, without the words... Look. Look look at the sky now. What color is it? Or the way a hawk flies. Or you wake up, and your ribs are bruised thinking so hard on someone. What do you call that?"

-as spoken by the character Inman in Cold Mountain (book written by Charles Frazier)

I relate to this story because it's an inner life I live, similar to the two main characters - Ada and Inman. And I loved the book so much because of all the rich detail and wonderfully majestic portrayal of life amongst the mountains and nature. The incredibly deep meaning and atmosphere behind everything. Slow like the South. I think that's what I relate to the most about Southern culture. The slow pace of life in the rural parts. I am proud that I'm from Tennessee. I truly am. But I know that to be best understood in this life, I need to be elsewhere. Far away from the South. It will always be where I'm from. I love a good story, I appreciate good acting, I love more than anything the feelings one can experience appreciating art. And that's all I care to be a part of so long as I have my mate by my side.

Happy New Year, you guys. =)

Skinner's dragon

2011-12-30T19:56:00.000-06:00

I want to be this little guy's friend.

This is a photo the rad artist Skinner posted on Twitter. I've found myself following a bunch of dude artists who draw grotesque things and are into toys of monsters, etc. Real boy stuff. And I'm not so much into all that but after being exposed to it for awhile now, it's starting to rub off on me.

Love the way Ice Cube talks

2011-12-23T14:14:00.000-06:00

Today is a special day in that I got to catch up on all the stuff I follow via Google Reader. It's lovely when I can do that. One stop shopping for the blogs I don't read or don't remember to read on the fly. Most blog sites allow you to start following it via Google Reader which makes it very easy to 'capture' a website you like for future viewings. VERY HANDY! One blog I stumbled upon a few months ago, I'm not sure how, is MONDOBLOG. I can't easily access a bio of the blogger but I think he's a London-based art dealer who travels around and sees TONS of art and is obviously passionate about it. His blog contains so many wonderful pictures covering all sorts of artistic/aesthetic topics. Total candy for me. Anyway, in one of his posts is a video of Ice Cube and it's a cool little video stop to make during internet browsing. I don't usually watch videos because I have a low tolerance for them, to be honest. You wouldn't know it based on the volume I post on my blog but what you see are the results from the little bit of time I can stand watching videos.

Directly from my journal

2011-12-20T23:26:00.002-06:00

12/20/11

After a frustrating work day that left me downtrodden, I've been whisked away as I expected by Patti Smith's book Just Kids. It makes me feel many things but mostly that I live a pop life and can't remember anything so that I may write anything near to autobiographical about my life. But I guess there could be ways to extract it if I felt it necessary. Middle school music has shrouded my mind since Friday and I keep it going by listening to that P.M. Dawn station I created on Pandora. Those memories are mine and they are tied to emotion and music. I feel however as if I've always been the one to wade on the surface, where I feel safe. I immediately find ways to show myself that circumstances I found myself in were of a 'pop' variety. The one repeating in my head right now is that I worked at Barnes and Noble out of college instead of some interesting used book store or small business bookstore. And so I tumble and tumble over familiar themes in my self-dialogue and am just tired of being boring to myself. However, I do feel I've achieved a sense of quiet that I've longed for the past few weeks. I am proud of that.
Good things come from the quiet.

Vanilla Ron Paul

2011-12-17T11:44:00.003-06:00

Holy crap I'm posting something already!! Had some time this morning to kick back with my headphones and watch Ron Paul on the Tonight Show. Headphones because Nate's still asleep. The reason this video is good to pass on is it's edited for all Ron Paul content, has no commercials, is an interview that covers a wide range of Dr. Paul's views, and Jay Leno's interviewing style is so non-confrontational. It's vanilla. Which is great for me right now because after the initial Occupy fervor I went through, reigniting all sorts of intense emotions in me, I've found that I'm STILL taking a break from it all. Politics are so bad right now that I think it can actually be damaging to my health to focus on them too long. So, for all those reasons this is a good video. I voted for Ron Paul in the primaries last presidential election and I'll do it again.

Beer

2011-12-16T23:59:00.004-06:00

For some reason I haven't been in the mood to blog lately and feel bad about it. In the meantime, this is a shirt I bought a couple weeks ago. The colors don't go with a lot in my wardrobe and it was too expensive for a shirt but I had to have it. An impulse buy I'm very happy with.

Rocket and Rocket

2011-12-09T20:37:00.001-06:00

Marry the Night

2011-12-07T08:18:00.004-06:00

All the art pieces shipped out yesterday afternoon! I think all of you should receive them by Friday.

Now, to the latest video by Lady Gaga. It's simply amazing. I've watched it I think 6 times now since it came out on Friday. It's long - like 14 minutes long - but it's a high quality mini-movie. And it's the most personal, vulnerable of her videos yet and brings out so many more dimensions of the song. I already really liked the song but now it means so much more.

Struggle, insanity, rebirth, dreams, darkness.

Mailing out artwork

2011-12-05T08:40:00.003-06:00

So last night I masterfully wrapped up all the pieces I'm sending out only to learn this morning that I might have to box them all. Not sure though. Long story short, I'm working on it but might not be able to send them out today as planned. Maybe I'm wrong and I'll have no problem, but I'm a pessimist when it comes to logistical things. Best case, I walk in to my local post office and they have all the box sizes I need. What I'm hoping for though is that there are boxes to fit at least a couple of the pieces...

Have a great week guys!

Not Black Friday

2011-11-24T15:45:00.009-06:00

This is my first shot. If it completely falls short and no one asks for any of these pieces, then I'll figure out something else. This art isn't going anywhere I don't want it to but I'm tired of sitting on it waiting to all the sudden become a business person who wants to go out and market it and figure out a fair price, etc., something I've been continually resistant to doing.

As I said in my previous post, here are my best pieces. "Best" turned out to simply mean the ones drawn on a rigid material - canvas panel or a stiff mat material used for framing. The deal is, tell me which one you want. Yes, this means YOU. If you want it, I will send it to you as-is. If you want to frame it or otherwise jazz it up for display go for it. I am hoping you take care of it, treat it nice, but if you get tired of it please re-gift it to someone else. I'm not gonna make you sign a contract saying you won't sell it for profit, but I'm hoping you won't without asking me first.

Bottom line is I am giving this to you because you're my friend. You're probably not a corrupt human being looking to take advantage of me.

I took all of these pictures on my phone using flash in the mid-quality Seattle daylight. Some colors, particularly green, didn't show up well. All of these will look much better in person.

Here we go:

#1 - CLAIMED BY EMILY R.

#2 - CLAIMED BY MARLIE

#3 - CLAIMED BY JUSTIN

#4 - CLAIMED BY MEGAN

#5 - CLAIMED BY ELIZABETH

#8 - CLAIMED BY ASHLEY

#10 - CLAIMED BY JUSTIN

All the people I'm aware of who read this blog know at least one way to get ahold of me. Don't be shy, just ask me for the flippin thing and give me your address. Let's make this as quick and easy as possible. I want these things outta here.

If this actually goes well (I have my doubts) then I'll start releasing the vast quantities of drawings on paper I've amassed. I don't think I can be a productive artist again until I get rid of this stuff. Similar to the philosophy of cleaning out your closet before buying new clothes.

Happy Thanksgiving. I am grateful for and love you all.

Occupy Love

2011-11-24T11:55:00.003-06:00

Ahhhh this video makes sense. It gives direction to what's going on. Occupy LOVE!!

Also, check out the website these filmmakers have. They're creating a big documentary on it all.

To that end I think I'm prepared to make a radical breakthrough with my art. I'm going to GIVE MY ART AWAY. Not to just anyone. I'm going to start with those closest to me. I think this is the only way I can move forward. I think my art life has stagnated because these pieces are just sitting around when they could be moved onward through love.

So I think what I'm going to do is take pictures of all my best pieces and post them, and my friends and family who read this blog can decide which one they want. Jen - I already know which one I'm going to send you - you sort of claimed it when I posted it on Facebarf a few months ago.

I give because I love and my art is the best way I can express that. My art is a gift not just for me but for others. I need to stop being selfish and worried about the rest of it.

Step to the right of your left hemisphere

2011-11-21T23:25:00.003-06:00

I really hate when I can't figure out how to get videos to embed. There's embed code available but it doesn't work. Please don't let that deter you. Watch this TED Talk, you will get sucked in because it's an incredible story told with such passion and clarity. Description of the talk:

Jill Bolte Taylor got a research opportunity few brain scientists would wish for: She had a massive stroke, and watched as her brain functions -- motion, speech, self-awareness -- shut down one by one. An astonishing story.

http://www.ted.com/talks/jill_bolte_taylor_s_powerful_stroke_of_insight.html

"We are the life force power of the universe."

Remember to Breathe

2011-11-19T11:36:00.008-06:00

I think I'm going to take an Occupy break this weekend, just so I can let other things move in to my brain. I've been pretty immersed in learning about the goings-on in different cities and talking about it and learning more about the issues, but I'm kinda tired right now. Honestly I went to bed not feeling very good and woke up feeling a little better. I think it's fucking drainage from my allergies again as it usually is when I start feeling Meh.

Last Saturday I went and saw Amanda Palmer perform at OccupySeattle. And I have to say before anything else at how strikingly beautiful this woman is. I mean, I see pictures of her and yeah she's pretty, but when you can see her in the flesh you can also pick up on her inner beauty which can really affect the perception of physical appearance. WOW I'm telling you I just couldn't believe it. What a fantastic, creative, passionate, kick ass human being. Very inspiring. At the end of the show when we were waiting to get stickers (you'll read below) she was a couple feet away, interacting with different peeps and it was unreal to see her so close. She's the coolest. I was so awestruck it was unreal.

Now on to the show - it was an interesting experience. It was at 5pm and it gets dark here at about 4:30 now so it was dark. It had also been raining all day but when we arrived down at the park it was barely misting, which was nice. It stayed that way the whole show. I think she played like 5 or 6 songs, all on this tiny ukelele. She closed with a song called "Ukelele Anthem" which is basically a call to go buy a ukelele (they're only $19.95) and play it. Play it badly, play it how ever you want. That maybe some of the evils of the world would be mitigated if people found a way to express their emotions through music and singing instead of doing destructive things. After the show she gave out free stickers Shepard Fairey made for the song:

I had a really interesting reaction during that song. I knew it was the closer, but as we were surrounded by people (Amanda estimated about 500 showed up) all these thoughts and emotions flooded into me. It's easy to sit in the comfort of my apartment or at work and learn about and talk about the issues surrounding this movement, but when I was actually down there taking part in something totally sober and under the cover of night (unlike when we marched after the Halloween pub crawl during the afternoon), I felt very vulnerable. Sometime thoughts can be so intense they can take over your body and so I found myself on the brink of a panic attack. Which always fucking sucks. They never escalate to full-blown anymore because I know how to stop them but UGH it was no fun. It's this extreme reaction of feeling in danger and trapped. I shake my head at how it felt but also how silly it seems to have them. The last time I experienced a panic attack it was when I saw Inception at the movie theater. That movie was so intense for so long and the music was way too good at conveying that, that I had to talk myself down from constant panic attacks the last 30 minutes of the movie. I felt trapped and yes it was fictional but I felt like I was in danger.

Wow so I didn't expect to talk about that but sometimes stuff just comes out when you start writing. What triggered me to think about it was reading the blog post Amanda just did on Occupy. She says at one point:

at almost every occupy, you could feel the sense of togetherness.
i’ve never felt so much hope concentrated in one place, with such a general sense of unease thrown in for good measure.

So it made me feel okay that she sensed the unease as well. That I'm not some fragile person but a sensitive human being and I pick up on things. Okay. I also saw a picture of the stage in Vancouver and it says "Remember to Breathe" on the front. Ahhhhhhh. And that, my friends, is how you recover from a panic attack. Breathe and clear your mind. Don't let the bad thoughts have their way. Breathe.

Get the hands involved

2011-11-12T00:52:00.003-06:00

After a couple hours of watching music videos on a Friday night, I inevitably end up watching the Backstreet Boys

And get my hands involved emoting my sing-a-long

A cold front hit Seattle today and the apartment was cold, hence my awesome toboggoscarf.

I'm upset but looking flawless

2011-11-12T00:21:00.001-06:00

Love this song but I'd be more convinced if Gwen weren't wearing a full face of makeup rolling around in bed, etc.

REPTAR

2011-11-11T23:14:00.002-06:00

This band is named REPTAR which of course is the name of the fucking dinosaur on RUGRATS the awesome tv show those my age most likely enjoyed as a late-kid. This song is so super enjoyable. Guhhhhhh just go listen.

Girls with Legs

2011-11-09T22:36:00.001-06:00

Been waiting to post this just to make sure it was as great as I thought it was. Ahhhh it is.

On this earth

2011-11-08T19:21:00.003-06:00

Uhm. I don't feel particularly inspired to write a blog post but I will give it a shot. What would I tell the handful of people who read this? Well first off I don't really think that way when I write on here honestly. I write as if this unknown mass of people may glance at it. It's a little sad when I think of how insignificant people really are. And the impermanence of life and all that.

And then to write of something I find interesting. Because I'm not going to write something on here to document my life. I understand others doing just that and I think it's an amazing gift for the people they have in mind when they do it, but me I'm just trying to blend journal/art/creativity with a place for me to retrace pictures and videos and capture emotions in the ways this medium allows.

I read a quote by Saul Williams the other day and it floored me.

"We speak of art with flaming passion, and then do work, void of compassion, and wonder why, reality, is bleeding fiction."

The goal of making a living doing something I love is my ultimate goal, but it's so puzzling and also there is a flow to things. My day will come and I will be prepared.

Twitter Top Ten

2011-11-02T21:07:00.005-05:00

Just in case you're considering checking out the Twittah, here are my Top Ten (in no particular order):

@OccupySeattle - name speaks for itself. Seems like the movement has recharged since moving to a new homebase last weekend (the march Nate and I took part in).

@OccupyWallSt - again, pretty obvious. Good for keeping up with goings on in NY as well as national/global occupy news.

@NRDC - National Resource Defense Council. Great info, news. I realize I'm biased, but this is MY Top Ten, eh?

@AlecBaldwin - yeah, it's actually him. He tweets in spurts to answer questions people send him, but he's also politically engaged and interesting.

@DadBoner - Ok, so I've been told this is a fictional account, but it's engrossing. It's a dude living in Michigan who eats at Buffalo Wild Wings every Wednesday and hasn't been having luck with the ladies lately. Lots of bathroom humor and an alcoholic. Great for the kids!!

@JennyJohnsonHi5 - this chick is rude crude and always hilarious. Caution.

@MsTerryMcMillan - author, you might recall some of her more popular titles, like How Stella Got Her Groove Back. She's a different sort of Twitter-er, also tweets in longer spurts but she always brings the attitude and wisdom.

@BretEastonEllis - author, I'm obsessed with the enigma he creates around his persona. Big film and culture geek; usually tweets late night Pacific Time.

@pattonoswalt - my favorite comedian. Also very geeky and creative. For instance, today he was on a #tatooinesexslang topic that was amusing. (Tatooine is a Star Wars thing)

@michaelianblack - my second favorite comedian. Hasn't been tweeting as much lately, which makes me sad, but his sense of humor makes me laugh and shake my head gravely.

I understand that Twitter is a foreign world to new people, but it's the quickest way to get information THAT YOU'RE INTERESTED IN. Unlike Facebarf you can follow and unfollow people on Twitter as your preferences change or they stop tweeting or for WHATEVER REASON. And you know what? You can start following them again if your'e so inclined. There's no commitment. There's a certain language that goes on with Twitter, but it's easy to learn (i.e., Google any questions you have).

P.S. I totally forgot about @alexpardee. Whoops. He's an amazing artist with a quirky creative mind he shares through tweets as well as in other places. Yep.

Halloween Pub Crawl and Occupy Seattle

2011-10-29T21:05:00.003-05:00

Lots of photos taken by me today. Big Saturday and it turned out to be just a gorgeous day for photo ops inside and out. Chronological:

The following video showed the clash that occurred when a group of zombies ambushed the regular Halloween pub crawlers. (not much happened)

KEXP bitchazzzz

2011-10-26T19:45:00.002-05:00

Hi!

It's been a REALLLLLY long time since I've posted. At least it really feels like it. But instead of going into what I've been up to, I want to share a mini-documentary with you about Seattle and it's music scene and the coolest radio station I've come across, KEXP. The best thing about them is they stream it online and have apps for at least the iPhone so people all over the world listen. It's wonderful. Just go to their website (in the hyperlink) and give it a whirl. Ahhh.

But something that has sort of given me food for thought on many occasions is why is Seattle such an amazing place for music? Well, this video addresses that very question.

Gahh I can't embed the video. So please go to this page: http://kcts9.org/something-in-the-water

Red Wall

2011-10-17T22:20:00.001-05:00

Walking around on the University of Washington campus today:

Why was I there? Research at the graduate library for work. It's just a beautiful campus and it was a gorgeous fall day.

Lots of college kids around.

Ate Chipotle with Nate.

Car sales

2011-10-13T00:31:00.001-05:00

If you're going to buy or sell a car, the best advice I could give you is to find someone who can handle that shit and ask them to do it on your behalf. With you present, of course.

That is the advice I give. Some people can play those games in the name of money and cars, but some people can't. If you're one of the latter like me, that is the advice I give you.

That being said, Nate and I are now CAR-LESS. Without cars. Sold my Yaris. Living the life, man.

Staggeringly terrible

2011-10-07T10:11:00.000-05:00

Washed Out is terrible live. The worst show I've ever been to.

It was cool to venture out to a newly opened historic-theater-turned-entertainment-venue, the Neptune. However, there were some weird "stained glass" renderings of Neptune and Aphrodite which were just hard colored plastic upon closer inspection. You can see them along the lower seating area in this stock image:

I think the venue is still making improvements and so I can't critique it as a final product, but they have a concession stand like a movie theater's. The chick behind the counter was WAYYYYYY bubbly happy like "What the fuck are you on?" happy. Bounding around. Literally bounding around behind the counter. Nate and Taffy purchased popcorn at exorbitant prices while I abstained. It just smelled bad. After they had been eating it awhile they figured out it was MSG that was causing the weird smell and giving Taffy a strange high and also a headache. I needed something caffeinated because I don't stay up late so I bought a $4 bottle of Diet Dr. Pepper but then it had no carbonation when I opened it so I had to switch it out for a Diet Pepsi. Whatever, it was something.

Woah wow though, what a terrible live music experience. The opening band was shitty too whoever they were. I mean, maybe Washed Out's music just isn't the type to translate well live, maybe they have a shitty sound person, they DEFINITELY have a shitty light person. They had this ELECTRIC BLAZING BLUE string of lights lining the back floor of the stage that fucking blinded you probably no matter where you were in the theater. They were always on and they were blinding. I mean, I sat there and just puzzled at what was going on. I could sort of recognize songs because I've been obsessively listening to the albums lately, but they didn't sound the same. "Weak sauce" was what I kept thinking in my mind. But it was really worse than weak sauce. Terrible. Don't know how they're playing such large shows when they suck so bad. $21 per ticket. Snaps my Washed Out listening streak for sure. I almost want to delete it off my iPod now. Yeesh. How can studio music sound soooo fucking bad live??????

POST SCRIPT 12/12/2011: I really feel like a dick now that I go back and realize how much this guy (this band this group) meant to me at the time. Especially after watching the video for Amor Fati and realizing this dude's history. He's a genuine person and those who played in his band at this godawful show were probably genuine people. And I'm just an asshole for shitting on them but they really shouldn't play live.

Wavves and Jobs

2011-10-05T21:36:00.002-05:00

Been keeping this video to myself but it gets selfish after a week.

Grab a beer, watch this video. And then make a mental note to type "Wavves Bug Youtube" on google and watch it again someday.

My assignments aren't hard. I give assignments I'd like to be given (lazy).

Woah wait one more assignment. RIP Steve Jobs. If you have or haven't seen the commencement speech he gave at Stanford, watch it. Only ~15 minutes.

Sound and Vision

2011-10-04T20:36:00.003-05:00

I attended the Washington Section AWRA (American Water Resources Association) conference today here in Seattle. After living and working in Seattle for a year now, it was really nice to start plugging in to what is going on environmentally and in my industry in this state. I attended the Tennessee/Kentucky AWRA conferences in Nashville, but Washington is very different in a water resource sense. On the one hand you have the Puget Sound area, which is marine/estuarial but much of the rest of the state after you traverse the Cascades is a semi-arid desert (receiving about 4 inches of rain per year). So I heard talks about irrigation methods, something I've never really heard about before, and learned that Eastern Washington is a significant contributor to WORLDWIDE agricultural supply. For example, I remember a speaker say 20% of the world's hops supply comes from the Yakima Basin. Hops, being an ingredient in beer, is VERY IMPORTANT PEOPLE!

The keynote speaker during lunch was Eric Becker, a Yale-educated filmmaker who had just completed his first feature-length movie for the People For Puget Sound on activities related to their efforts called "Sound and Vision." He shared two of the eight vignettes the movie is composed of during the talk and he mentioned that another portion was posted on Vimeo, so I darted for it when I got home. Not only is he obviously a talented filmmaker, he was extremely well spoken and the topics covered in this particular film speak for themselves. Presented is an inspiring look at the work done to restore the Nisqually Estuary, which is just south of Seattle. Particularly moving was seeing the tidal influence within the estuary after being disconnected from the sea due to man-made levees for 100 years.

As he said in his talk, issues are thought-provoking when reading or hearing about them, but to see them expressed in visual media can really connect people even more to the importance and meaningfulness of the issue.(it's only ~6 minutes long, so watch it if you get the chance)

Sound and Vision | Part Seven: Nisqually Restoration from People For Puget Sound on Vimeo.

POST SCRIPT 12/31/2011: So this video is no longer existing on Vimeo. Sorry about that. However, I feel a bit sour reading this on New Year's Eve as I realized through following Mr. Eric Becker on Twitter that he wasn't worth following on Twitter (lawyer-speak). This video and what he said at that conference still stands though.

No Hangover October

2011-09-30T20:19:00.002-05:00

Fall things.
I think it's Fall now. It's like cold outside. In the stillness I see possibility.

Haha dude I'm so a poet. Actually, when I was pulling out of my depression in college I wrote a lot of poetry. There was one poem I wrote during that time that was really a Poem but I think it was part of all the journals I recycled before the move out West. Kinda wish I could find it, read it again, but I remember the sentiment. It was the feeling of sitting on the biggest roundest highest hill in the land with the sun trying to shine on my shoulder but I couldn't let it.

I'm not saying I feel that way right now, I'm just reflecting on poetry.

I've been listening to the Washed Out album lately. It would be appropriate to say it's the only thing I've been listening to.

Beautiful cover art huh?

Woah shit I just did a google search and they're playing here in Seattle next fucking week. AHHHHHHHH. Speaking of, Moby is doing a DJ set tonight but it's $25 to go and I would be going alone and it starts at midnight. Not gonna happen. Dude I'm so sore from walking 2 miles round-trip to work everyday this week UP BIG HILLS. Seriously I'm really sore. Like going to the gym all week sore. Woof.

Tomorrow starts October and it's gonna be NO HANGOVER OCTOBER for me. A worthy goal. Much more realistic than the Sober October goal a friend of mine may be attempting. I told her to switch it to No Hangover with me.

Gobbledygook

2011-09-28T21:34:00.001-05:00

Don't really have much to report. Just working. I hate that. Where I just get flattened out emotionally and creatively because of the "grind." My job isn't even that hard. It's a privileged little job where I sit at a computer all day reading science shit. And yet I whine. And wish I could work 8-2 everyday instead of 8-4. During those last two hours it feels like time has gone on break and forgotten to get on with itself.

We're totally moved into our new place. Nate got sick like 6 days ago. No fun for him. And I don't like it because, well, my mate is sick and isn't happy about it and feels like shit. It's okay for like 2 days but after that it gets super lame for all involved, especially the sick one. He's at work right now though, and I think he's really on the road to recovery.

It's fucking Fall man. I'm not thrilled to tell you the truth. Gipped (jipped?) on summer if you ask me. Yeah I got the beach for a week but summer in Seattle lasted like 2 months!?! It is what it is. The climate is changing. I've heard that Seattle usually experiences 3 months of summer but that it's been changing over the years. Global warming people. It really is happening. I read scientific literature, it's HERE. And no it doesn't flat out mean everyone gets warmer, things get more extreme and just different. We're in a good position here in the PNW (Pacific Northwest) as far as sea level rise goes though. Our ground is made from glacial till, except the tidal flats that were reclaimed (filled in) and built on back in the day. Glad we're living on Capitol HILL now. However, we are on the Ring of Fire so that's a bit disconcerting, earthquakes and whatnot. I don't think people realize that multiple earthquakes have happened in New Zealand and Japan since the big one off the shore of Japan that caused that catastrophic tsunami. Things are changing. The earth takes no prisoners, it'll just kill ya.

I'm telling you what, what the fuck is going on in the U.S. of A with the pervasive ignorance. Not even gonna get into it here because this is my inner place, this blog. My personal space. Don't make me get all New York Times and Daily Show on dat ass. Just glad I live close to Canada. But it comes down to it all being an Earth thing, not a US thing. Fly the fucking Earth flag not the US flag.

Amor Fati

2011-09-22T18:43:00.000-05:00

Listen to this for bliss

Happy beach

2011-09-20T09:42:00.003-05:00

Us at the beach.

Do I have to go to work?? Sigh.

Band of Horses at the Paramount Theater

2011-09-18T15:36:00.000-05:00

Our first full day back in Seattle we went to see Band of Horses at the Paramount Theater. This theater is fucking amazing, I posted stock images of it when I wrote about seeing the Deftones there back whenever that was. We were pretty high up in the balcony but here's a video of them playing The Funeral by a fan near the front. The lead singer Ben Bridwell is wearing a Sonics t-shirt someone threw up on stage right before the song.

The band originally formed in Seattle in 2004 but now they are based in South Carolina. Towards the end of the show Ben talked about how they've been on this long weird tour and only had 2 shows left. I'm excited for them to get a break, it seems like they've been touring for a long time.

The biggest reason I bought tickets to this show is because I missed them playing in Nashville at the outdoor concert series Live on the Green last year. They were scheduled to perform RIGHT AFTER we moved. I was seriously crushed because I knew they were taking off in popularity coming off the release of their latest album so it was a sweet spot as far as experiencing them live would be. But I missed it so I made sure to snatch up tickets like it was my job when I saw they would be here almost exactly a year later.

Yesterday I revelled in the beauty of their music having experienced it live, laying on the couch drinking sweet sweet Pacific Northwest beer. I get really emotional after a live concert experience sometimes, especially if it's a band I consider a "heart" band of mine, and so it happened with Band of Horses. Just beautiful music and I always feel truly grateful to get the chance to experience it in person.

I want your love and I want your revenge

2011-09-17T18:07:00.002-05:00

While I'm at it in the Lady Gaga frame of mind, the woman is an artistic genius. You can call bullshit or whatever but it's the truth. Besides Judas, this is the other pivotal video/song of hers. If you're going to be an pop musical artist in this generation you not only have to craft a penetrating song you have to collaborate with others to make a video worthy of what the song is trying to portray. Here it is. Bad Romance.

Bye G+

2011-09-17T17:51:00.002-05:00

I deleted myself off Google Plus as well as Facebarf. I don't really have any beef with Google+ I just need to CHILLL to the max. I can't handle all of it. I have enough going on. Good news is that contrasting with Facebarf Google Plus is somehow able despite all the difficulties to delete my profile immediately. Google > Facebarf

You, my friend are awesome

2011-09-17T17:41:00.000-05:00

I just really want to say that I love everyone who reads my blog and I realize how precious that attention is. "Oh what am I going to do in these couple minutes I have?"

You read my blog. So a super huge THANK YOU and I've re-checked myself that life is about the quality of friends you have, not quantity.

Stupid layout

2011-09-17T15:47:00.000-05:00

Man I miss Xanga. Anyone remember that shit? Christie? I could understand and tweak the html of my page to suit my needs. It was easy. Well it was trial and error, but it was there for me to learn. I cannot figure out blogger it does not make sense to me. A bunch of bullshit. Just give me the tools and let me figure it out myself for pete's sake. So I changed the layout of my blog. Not happy with it. BLAH.

Nate says I should learn web design so that I can do what I want online. I should.

Love you Gaga but WTF

2011-09-17T14:28:00.001-05:00

I'm still really pissed at Lady Gaga for releasing "You and I" as the latest single that she's making FIVE videos for. It's by far the shittiest song on the album. So I default back to "Judas" to bring me comfort. It's a pivotal video, rich in imagery and ambiguous in meaning. I think every girl can relate to the following lyric:

"Jesus is my virtue
And Judas is the demon I cling to"

Find a guy who encapsulates both. =)

Unreal reality

2011-09-16T20:21:00.001-05:00

Just a little update. My three day work week has been much more difficult than I imagined. Coming back home has been weird to be honest. The first time I've returned to Seattle from wherever and been like, "Wha?"Vacation definitely gave me a new perspective. It's like I came back a different person, but that seems nuts. I was only gone for 8 days. I know people that came back from Burning Man talk about a weird transition phase getting back into normal reality. Not having been to that festival because it coincided with said vacation, I imagine I'm going through a light version of what I hear Burners talk about. I mean, I feel alienated and weird so much of the time already it's the story of my life, but somehow it never gets comfortable to be different. I come back to work and I'm like, "What am I doing?!?!" yet it's also accompanied with a drive to focus in more on what I'm doing. An extra chance to figure this out. One of the main motivations in deleting my FB account. Need to clear the clutter and get down to what's important. Will I ever get an a-ha moment of "THIS IS WHAT I'M DOING WITH MY LIFE IT ALL MAKES SENSE?" Probably not, if I were to guess. Oh life you crazy bitch.Yeah so Nate and I are in the process of moving to a new apartment. So I work at work and then I work when I get home (but at least I get to drink beer at the latter).Have a great weekend you guys. =)

New Times

2011-09-13T17:27:00.001-05:00

Back from vacation today. I feel sick. Lots of stuff going on that's exciting, but for now I need rest. Back to work tomorrow.I deleted my Facebook account. Technically what happens is you're deactivated for 14 days and then it gets deleted. But if in those 14 days you log in at all or "like" anything on other websites, it cancels the deactivation. I hope it works. I'm just over it.

Can't think of a title

2011-09-02T12:51:00.002-05:00

I think if I was a in my mid-twenties in 1987 and had musical talent, I would've been Richard Marx. I think that's a pretty honest assessment of myself - equally parts lame but passionate and talented in my own way. Minus the fame thing.

I heard this song on Pandora and went to watch the video on YouTube hoping for images of warm beaches since that's where Nate and I are headed tonight, but there's nothing of the sort in this video. Just him sulking at a bar and playing pool. I still love the song though and it's end-of-summer appropriate. Happy Labor Day Weekend, guys.

Science (infinity sign) Art

2011-08-28T00:03:00.002-05:00

I'd like to be smart about being crazy. Or, I'd like to be scientific about the way I express and distribute my art.

Ian Frazier

2011-08-27T12:27:00.002-05:00

I'm reading a book from the library instead of either of the books I've bought recently. It's a new book (new to the library anyway) called "Travels in Siberia" by Ian Frazier. It's non-fiction. I've really been enjoying it. Mr. Frazier is a lovely writer. Here's a paragraph written about his stay in Nome, Alaska in anticipation of a trip across the Bering Strait to Russia which illustrates it:

"Nome does not go out of its way to be ingratiating. To an unromantic eye, the town in certain seasons may look like an expanse of mud with pieces of rusted iron sticking out of it. Trees in Nome are so rare that the town's official architectural walking tour features both of them; it is perhaps ungenerous to point out that in other places such landmarks would be considered shrubbery. During stays in Nome, I was usually depressed, in an uninterrupted and satisfying manner I never could have pulled off at home. Often I was waiting for a break in the weather so I could fly somewhere. I would emerge from my room in the Nome Nugget Motel in the morning to see what the chances were today, and I'd find the usual lowering, stormy sky draped above sea and land like a tent you have to hold up with your head to keep it from collapsing on you. On such days the best course was to return to the room, lie down, and stare up at the acoustical-tile ceiling."

Art in action

2011-08-26T00:12:00.002-05:00

So I don't really know how I'd do a post like this on G+ or FB.

Witness: About to be Destroyed

Destroyed

That ad I incorporated was from Artforum and the artist being advertised is Antony Gormley. Antony Gormley is the new Giacometti for me.

me and Daniel Johnston

2011-08-25T21:50:00.003-05:00

The list is simply too irresistable.

Being hormonal or whatever I've been the last 3 days is crazymaking.

I think I'm becoming one of those people (again) who buys books and then they just sit around and I gaze at them fondly unable to read them.

Social technology is overwhelming coupled with sitting at a computer all day at work reading things and dealing with more technology.

And I've been feeling so overwhelmed with the possibility of Life and All There Is that it becomes a fury all around me while seemingly I'm fine and life goes on. And goes on.

I really think I'm going to cancel my gym membership.

Nate and I go to the BEACH a week from tomorrow.

And all the sudden iTunes is not playing sound. Quit and restarted it and it works. There we go.

Saw Daniel Johnston last night at Neumos. He's my new heart hero. Here's the trailer for the documentary Nate showed me the night previous to introduce me to him. Love.

The End. Have a lovely weekend, you guys.

Change in current

2011-08-19T21:27:00.004-05:00

Uh oh. I just realized Google+ has clout. I had to go to my profile/feed there to access something delectable that I would have otherwise stored on my blog. You see, I put my good stuff here, friends. Music videos, etc.

I'm starting to put gems over there. FUN!

If you've been a social media hold-out and are interested in giving something new a shot, just give me the okay (granted I have your email address) and it's ON. Which means I'll send you an invite. I have 150 invites.....................................

Clickhyah

2011-08-13T21:56:00.000-05:00

Is my new banner amazing or what? Please click here if reading remotely.

Feed me Seymour!

2011-08-13T21:18:00.004-05:00

Hey there!
Ugh. I love Sam Harris. Because he's so smart, so calm, so different when he talks about the things that most other people get emotional to. I'm not saying he is emotion-less, but that it's much more subdued.

I recommend this hour long video to you as a podcast. It's worthwhile food for the brain. Life is richer when people talk about more high-minded things. And you know, I think intelligence should be celebrated. Stupidity is becoming more and more pervasive in certain mediums.

OR go here and see it in the best way which means it includes a setlist of the topics he will be talking about.

The Rich Get Richer

2011-08-12T09:01:00.003-05:00

Hey guys.
I watched Battle in Seattle with Nate last night and it really drove home important points for me. First off, I will say you should see this movie if you haven't. I didn't even know these protest/riots happened - in Seattle in December of 1999. Back then I was living in Johnson City, TN finishing up my first semester of college. So I guess I can't feel too uninformed. I didn't have cable and spent most of my dial-up internet time on Phish message boards. I was also busy with school, yaknow.

But I think this movie makes sense right now because of the protests that have been happening around the world in the name of freedom. I'm thinking Egypt, for instance. The Seattle protest was against the World Trade Organization, which was holding a big meeting in town. The protesters decided something needed to be done about the WTO because though they claimed they were about helping countries all over the world trade and prosper, their real agenda was to squeeze what they could out of poor countries and get richer.

Hm. And this is a very familiar story - the rich and powerful doing all they can to get richer to the exclusion of helping anyone who needs it. I'm not going to try and understand the sociopathic hunger for power and money, what drives these people, but it's important for those of us who have a conscience to have our priorities straight. And that's what this movie really drove home for me. It should always be PEOPLE OVER PROFITS.

We are humans. What's the point of life? Helping other humans. It's that simple. It's not about attaining wealth. We have a biological imperative to help each other out. And by that I mean beyond the rational reasons why, it FEELS GOOD to help others. We're social animals, we're altruistic animals, capable of unending compassion. There are real people out there, and they're all important. Except the sociopathic assholes.

In college I had this sort of prophetic dream about being recognized for some scientific breakthrough, and ever since then I've felt that the way I'll be able to contribute best towards helping humanity is through science. That's what I'm good at. I think I also have the capacity to help the natural resources, especially animals. Life is all there is. Quality of life is what we should aim for, for everyone. I realize this post was very human-based, but I just want to give a shout out to all other biological life out there. YO! It's FRIDAY BITCHEZZZZZ

I love the Gorge

2011-08-08T09:09:00.003-05:00

Phish was kick ass. This weekend really felt like a vacation because of it. Okay, it was hot when we got there Saturday afternoon and set up camp at the Gorge (around 90 degrees) and we didn't have a shade tent. But we improvised and waited out the hot part of the day. Once 5 o'clock rolled around the sun and heat started going on the defensive. I will now share with you the process:

Get to the Gorge, set up camp.

Now, walking into the venue is the real treat because you get some good views from the campgrounds, but you ain't seen nothin yet.

We're almost there.....

And BOOM:

The weather was amazing, the view was amazing. How can you not be relaxed as hell here???

And then the sun starts to set and Phish have started playing.

The music was great, though I'm personally sick of Tweezer and they played it three times. Well, yaknow they reprised it or whatever. Pshhh. That and a shitty Prince Caspian are my only gripes about the music. The rest of it was phenomenal and I forgot how wonderful the crowd vibe is. SO CHILL. SO much chiller than any festival crowd, even Sasquatch. I have to say it's relieving to only camp one night. Oh what a wonderful night.

We were so exhausted the next day though. Lots of naps and laying on the couch back at the apartment were had.

And now to start another work week. =)

Goin Phishing

2011-08-05T09:10:00.003-05:00

We're going to see Phish at the Gorge on Saturday. They're playing two nights, Friday and Saturday, but we're only going for Saturday. The tickets were pricey enough but then to camp there cost $60. And there's no fire allowed. Anyways, Nate's super excited. He's gotten turned on to Phish since we've been together and this will be his first show.

I'm interested in seeing how I react to it. Last Phish show I experienced was at Bonnaroo a couple years ago. I wasn't into it so much, but it was an overall trying festival for me anyhow and the guys I was with weren't into it. We stayed for a couple songs and left. They played two nights there also. I remember driving away from the venue while Phish was playing the last night of the festival. They were nice driving away music. Bonnaroo sucks.

But as far as the last time I saw Phish for themselves, it was in Salt Lake City, UT a month or so after graduating college, so 2003. It was a wonderful experience, but also a wonderful time in my life. The venue was amazing too. I'm running short on time because my Friday of work beckons, but I pulled up some pics from that show:

This is what I looked like after it was over:

Museum foray

2011-08-02T19:15:00.003-05:00

Hey there!

Nate and I ended up going to the Seattle Art Museum on Saturday, as planned. It's a HUGE museum. It took us 3.5 hours to look at it all. My soul was definitely filled with something wonderful. Artifacts from cultures all over the world and all through human history. I was really impressed with how the exhibits seemed to convey something inexplicable about the people who made the pieces. In particular, I loved the Aboriginal/Australian works and African pieces. I didn't jot down any artists so that I could present photos of examples, but oh well.

The visit really made me hungry for more art. To see more art. An interesting thing happens I think when you LOOK at a bunch of art, old and new, in different mediums. I feel an appreciation is truly gained, of Art and Artistry in general. I remember something one of my good friends told me as she embarked on a long college education in the fine arts - she said, "You have to look at as much art as you can." That always stuck with me. It's something that builds on itself too. An immersive visit to a museum or gallery triggers something in my brain. It's awe. But it's also a renewed kinship with other human beings. I think the same thing can be gained by viewing art from all over the world as traveling all over the world can - the realization that we have more in common with other people than differences. Everyone is human and the human experience is so rich. The only interjection I will make on that utopian vision is that there are also varying degrees of sociopaths out there and for that reason, vigilance should always be practiced.

Cycles in Life

2011-07-30T11:59:00.003-05:00

Hello. Hi. So I thought I'd try to make a blog post out of nothing. Well, when I didn't have some main topic I wanted to discuss. Usually in these cases I use bullet points. Observations I've had, etc. but with Twitter and Facebook and now Google+, it seems I don't feel like sharing information in that format on here. This is the only place I can go and write a BLOG post, not some little anecdote. I will say though, to get one out of the way - I've started LIKING spiders. I'd been deathly afraid of them since I was a little kid but something happened, slowly. I started seeing them as not my enemy. I started seeing them as creatures in their own right, just trying to live. I guess my rationality and general empathy for animals kicked in. It's really nice. I see a picture of one, or I see one in real life and my knee-jerk reaction now is "Oh how cute. Look at that little guy." Not sure if I'd have that first reaction to tarantula sized spiders, but I'm guessing eventually I will. I'm not about to go get one as a pet or anything, let's get real here, but I'm pleased I've been able to slowly work out this irrational fear over the course of time.

I think the plan for today once Nate gets up is to go to the Seattle Art Museum. I've been in an art-less existence lately and feel a museum trip would be a welcome thing to feed my soul with. I also started thinking that for a long time I've said I go through "cycles" in life. When I try to look at that from the perspective of being bipolar I can sort of make more sense out of it. And I think that similar to what triggers mania in bipolar people, I am triggered into a higher energy state by stress. I'm not talking regular stresses of everyday life, I'm talking on a long-term basis. Like my last major mania was triggered by multiple life-changing stresses. It's like I had to shift into a higher gear to cope with all that was going on, to "channel" for lack of a better word, all the emotions and new patterns I had to deal with.

Now, to contrast with bipolar depression, I haven't been depressed since I broke through a 4 year depression with 2 years of therapy back in college. So I know what depressed is and I don't get that down - I just get into a lower energy lifestyle. I'm generally not as creative (well, being creative drains me) and I can't exercise as much. To try and be higher energy just stresses my body out and makes me sick. I've been sick a decent amount this year. More than normal at least. It's an interesting paradox. I get "manic" to deal with stress but to try and get to a similar high energy state without the stress stimulus serves to stress me out and make me sick.

I experienced food poisoning almost two weeks ago. It made me totally reset at a lower energy state. I'm much more conservative in eating, drinking, creativity, exercise. But I feel so much better. I think I got caught in a trying-to-be high energy loop with in all the above areas and my body was rejecting it. So I think I'm now learning to sort of honor the spot on the energy continuum I'm at and be happy with it. I've always been a sensitive creature. I think maybe a lot of people are. And I'm actually glad I got sick two weeks ago. I had to get really sick in order to get healthy.

Footbrawl

2011-07-26T14:05:00.000-05:00

Fell in love with a pine cone

2011-07-18T00:06:00.004-05:00

The deal is, I went to Portland with Nate and Taffy, our office admin, to the Portland office open house for my company. We had a wonderful time and it was great to finally meet people in real life I had worked with over the phone. And they just moved in to a sweet new office. It was a wonderfully catered event which included an open bar with great beer.

In the midst of it all, I noticed a pine cone proudly displayed in the office. As the night wore on, I became more fixated on it until it was offered to me. I almost didn't take it because I felt I wasn't worthy, but was told there were other big pine cones like it and to go ahead. I took it home with us to Seattle the next day and it's now proudly displayed on Taffy's desk in the lobby. The pine cone was a minor celebrity by the end of the night. Here is the photo documentation in chronological order:

Nate took this last professional quality photo which solidified its place in the world of celebrity pine cones.

Evil Things

2011-07-07T08:46:00.003-05:00

A couple things happened last night that while seemingly silly, really affected me. I found it hard to go to sleep even though I was very tired. And then I woke up to my alarm this morning recalling that I had dreamed seeing Courtney Love in concert and chatted with her then flew off, as I do in dreams sometimes. She couldn't believe I could fly like that of course, so I came back and did my takeoff again for her.

That made me feel better. That, and whatever else I dreamed, made a lot of the raw emotion I felt last night wash away. Some still remains though, enough for me to say something about it now.

Basically, I realized how cruel and unfair and evil humans can be. And how incredibly privileged I am to be living where I am and enjoying a pretty much carefree life. I feel at some point it does no good to sit back and enjoy the good life though, that it somehow creates an imbalance, knowing how many other people in the world are NOT living the good life and that I can do SOMETHING. I started to think about the little girl I sponsor in the Philippines through Children International and realized that that was something. I have a job wherein I help give more awareness to the environment through science. That's something. I kind of think I need to view more of what I do on a daily basis in that light.

Lately I've been doing a good job at seeing the value in what I do instead of beating myself up for not doing MORE. It's an infuriating loop in my psyche that I need to get over because it's limiting. It's of course useful because it means I hold myself to way higher standards than anyone could impose on me, but I can't be all militant on myself all the time, I'm too sensitive.

Man, I feel like I'm making no sense. I want to write more about it but it all becomes jumbled in my head. Things aren't usually black and white. I don't really know what else to say though I wish I could. Which is a good thing because I need to finish getting ready for work and be on my way.

I'm just so incredibly grateful for the all the opportunities I've been given in life, the decisions I've made, and the people I choose to surround myself with. There's a lot of evil in the world. And all I can do is keep fighting against it, keep trying to educate myself and not lose sight of what's important.

Happy 4th

2011-07-04T12:36:00.001-05:00

June pictures

2011-07-03T11:24:00.003-05:00

First off, isn't this the cutest brain EVER?

And I don't remember which bar's bathroom this was, but I found it funny.

We spent a Saturday afternoon (that was actually sunny) down in Georgetown, which is a neighborhood just south of where we live. How it works is that during the warm months a lot of neighborhoods have parties and parades. The one for Georgetown was called Georgetown Carnival and we really loved it. It was like half flea market, half music festival with other fun activities thrown in. All the local bars were open too. This is a little gem I found at the flea market area.

I went to the doctor when I got sick (allergies) and got bored while waiting to get my tetanus shot.

This is something I LOVE about Seattle. There are overflowing baskets with wonderfully colorful flowers hanging EVERYWHERE. I stop to gaze at them a lot. This is one I pass on my walk to work every morning.

I finally got to see a waterer in action as I gazed out my office window.

Oh and one day at work I was scandalized when I witnessed two tow truck drivers park in a No Parking Anytime zone while they walked around Pioneer Square on their lunch break, effectively blocking a whole lane of traffic during lunch rush. Me and my office mate called the company and complained and I wrote a bad review for them on Yelp, which was eventually removed because it was flagged as inappropriate since I didn't actually experience their service.

Nate and I went to see Neil Gaiman speak at the Town Hall here and it was a surreal experience to be honest. He's one of my favorite writers. Terrible but only picture I have of it.

On Friday night, Nate and I made a fantastic Thai curry dish using a recipe my office mate passed on to me. I was in charge of frying the tofu and making the brown rice while Nate cooked up the veggies and crafted the curry. It was a fantastic meal. Nate likes red peppers and I don't, as you can see.

And then just yesterday we decided to take the ferry to Bainbridge Island on a wonderful sunny day and see what it was about. We ended up walking around a bit and enjoying a wonderful snack and beers at a waterfront restaurant. We're chilling at our table in this picture.

In case you're curious, here's where Bainbridge Island is in relation to Seattle. It's only a 30 minute ferry ride.

Always wonderful to leave Seattle only to be welcomed back to it. This is the view from the return-trip ferry. Home.

Punctuated with Art

2011-06-22T21:08:00.004-05:00

I was sick for a few days. Sinus/allergy issues and other things. But I'm back. And I finally finished this piece I started when we were out of canvas a few weeks ago. I flattened and taped up a cardboard box and went to town. I'm not sure if it's finished aesthetically but it's definitely finished in my mind. I'm ready to start on something new and it marks the end of what's been a downturn in my health and attitude.

Free of hair

2011-06-16T09:00:00.002-05:00

It had to be done. The reasons? As you could tell in the previous post, I was just tired of having it. But there were more practical reasons - I accidentally burned the crap out of all my hair last week when my wavy iron somehow got cranked up to max heat and I didn't realize it, and also I would like to save the money and the hassle of getting my hair cut for awhile. I've been steadily paying for expensive haircuts every 4-5 weeks for the last 4 years. That's a lot of money. And though my hair looked fabulous and I really enjoyed it, I eventually stopped enjoying it. And so it's gone and I start over. This isn't the first time I've buzzed my hair this short so I'm prepared for the unfavorable reactions from people. I also had dreadlocks for five years, so again, I know what it's like for people to not like my hairstyle. I don't care. I did this for me. And I'm happy!

Hair gets on my nerves

2011-06-15T09:23:00.001-05:00

Nate gave me a haircut last night at my direction. It's hard for me to resist wanting to buzz it all off at this point. Hair is so fucking needy!

I hate you, I love you

2011-06-13T20:53:00.004-05:00

Things that piss me off: (because I can say them and I'm going to say them)
- being bloated for more than a couple days. It's a fucking curse on the female body and psyche.
- the general lack of honesty in the world
- and this is perennial, but it sometimes really gets to me how shiny everyone's lives are on Facebook. That's not real life, and I don't feel safe there to really even be myself. And it serves a purpose in a social context, sure, but I want MORE. The format on there and the way it's used is stifling in many ways. Lately I'm seeing its benefits as an event organizer and that's cool. I'm not gonna quit it or anything, I just wanted to do my yearly bitch about it.
- feeling sometimes like my life is just ticking away while I sit at my desk at work

Things I love: (because there's always that)
- having tattoos and showing them off during warm weather even though maybe it's not super proper at work
- finding new music and always knowing there's more of it out there just waiting to be discovered when I'm ready for it
- when people say hi on the city streets. It's rare and for whatever reason, it's usually black men. And not just in Seattle, it was true in Nashville and when I visited other cities like Athens, GA.
- when people ask how you're doing because they actually want to know the answer to that question

Yes, this is a black box but it plays a song that fits really well with what I just said. A take-home song, if you will.

Lykke Li

2011-06-10T20:53:00.001-05:00

Umm. This video/song is amazing.

Three Decades on Earth

2011-06-08T09:11:00.004-05:00

My birthday was pretty great. Perfect, really. Monday night (YES MONDAY) a group of friends came out to a local bar called the Unicorn which is really cool inside - carnival themed and brightly colored. The only other time I'd been there was for my hair stylist's 30th birthday and I couldn't think of anywhere more appropriate. I was sharing in the occasion with our new friend Matt, who's birthday is on the 10th but would be going back home to Texas for it. It made me feel good that all the people who came out are new friends and makes me soo grateful to my long-time friends Ashley and Kerry introducing us to four people who live here, through whom we met everyone else. It's been a friendship chain reaction, and we're so lucky to have them so soon after moving here.

I stuck to beer and so I didn't wake up with too bad of a hangover the next morning. I got to sleep in because I had asked off work for the day. Nate unfortunately has had back problems since Sasquatch which were aggravated by his going to work on Monday, so he found himself too stiff and in pain to go in. Which meant we got to spend the day together!

We went to Taco Bell to savor the magical hangover food that is the cheesy bean and rice burrito. Later in the afternoon, Nate went back to the doctor while I went to a local tattoo shop. I commemorated turning 30 with a tattoo on my forearm of my birthdate in Mayan numerals (6,7,8,1 for 6/7/1981), repeated three times in a line. I wanted to get it on the side of my forearm that already has a Mayan numeral 13 tattooed on it, but the artist recommended I get it on the other one. I took his advice and did it. Here's the link to the picture I posted of it on Twitter (I don't have time to do the pic uploading rigamaroll right now).

By the time I got home from the tattoo shop (Nate so lovingly picked me up so I didn't have to walk home in the rain - boo Seattle weather) it was 5:30 so Nate made a wonderful pasta dinner and we settled in and watched stuff from our DVR and chilled the rest of the evening. It was wonderful. All during the day I got to receive phone calls, texts, and messages on FB all wishing me happy birthday. I felt special. I am grateful to my friends and family, but most importantly to Nate who planned everything and paid for all my beers at the Unicorn and even the Taco Bell the next day. Fucking awesome!

I turn 30 tomorrow!

2011-06-06T09:09:00.002-05:00

Things about me that I find funny considering my VERY MATURE age:

I crimp my hair most mornings with a three-barrel curling iron (a wavy iron)
I watch Big Cat Diary and Crocodile Hunter in the morning before work
We're going to a carnival themed bar to start out my birthday festivities tonight
I still twirl my hair like a fiend
The album I've been listening to most lately is the new Lady Gaga
The building I work in has a toy store on the first floor
I still cut out pictures from magazines and put them on the wall for decoration
My corrective lens glasses have purple/pink frames
My idea of makeup is eyeliner
I really want a puppy

Squatch Photos

2011-06-03T08:39:00.003-05:00

You should be able to view the photos I posted on Facebook from Sasquatch by clicking here. Let me know if it doesn't let you.

Here's a few to show off the scenery of beautiful eastern Washington and The Gorge:

This was taken at the beginning of the Bright Eyes set at the main stage. Love them.

This last one is when we watched what ended up being my favorite show, Wavves. They played at 11:30am on Monday so it was a small crowd. The band was AWESOME and you just can't beat the scenery.

The Squatch

2011-06-01T08:52:00.003-05:00

I didn't plan ahead and only have a couple minutes this morning but I wanted to write about Sasquatch. About how it was SOOO much better than Bonnaroo. I feel sorry for people going to Bonnaroo. Have fun, suckers.

In what ways was it better?
- the weather was MUCH milder. It got sunny (70s) during the day and cool at night (40s). It is in a desert area, so the sun's presence makes all the difference. As soon as it would go behind a cloud for a few minutes, things cooled off considerably.

- it was smaller in size. I'd say a fourth of the size of Bonnaroo, but I haven't done the research to back that up.

- the people were much nicer. We were surrounded by Canadians in our camping area. I love them! Of course, there are assholes within any cultural group, but as a whole Canadians are more laid back and just nice. What a relief. I came across almost nothing but assholes at Bonnaroo. You always had to watch out for yourself there whereas at Sasquatch, I felt much safer.

We also camped in premier camping, which I think made a big difference. It meant we had bigger camp areas, less people, nicer bathrooms, and free showers! I had never showered at a festival before this one and it was wonderful. I took one every other day (the festival was 4 days long), which allowed me to retain my human-ness.

Okay gotta go to work. Pictures will come soon.

Trying out our sleeping bags in preparation for Sasquatch

2011-05-24T20:30:00.002-05:00

Actually, I'm in Nate's and he's in mine (throwing a play fit).

Giacometti

2011-05-22T21:54:00.003-05:00

Alberto Giacometti is my favorite artist. Without having learned about his life and work, I don't think I would still call myself an artist. I researched him in college for a lowly 2D art class project and I will never forget it.

I just wanted to give some more weight to what I said in my previous post about my latest painting reminding me of his style. I took a look on Google and this drawing is the closest thing to what I felt akin to when I said what I did in that post.

The fact that I kept working, I didn't let the paint dry and I kept pressing, which ultimately led me to use green and black oil pastel. When you use black like that in a painting, you are giving it finality whether you like it or not. This painting was a wild ride and I'm still reeling...

How do I say this?

2011-05-20T01:40:00.004-05:00

Apparently this is what I have to say to the world at the moment. All the sudden, my painting was finished. I even broke the skin barrier and used my fingers to put this piece in the right direction. And that direction was towards Amanda Fucking Palmer as I imagine her walking around wherever she is on her 10 day vacation. Artists are just so interesting. I love art. How does it happen, I hope I (never) know.

I have to add, humblebrag style, that I evoke a sense of Giacometti, my ultimate most favorite artist ever, in this one. A MAJOR WIN IN MY BOOK.

Acceptance is for pussies

2011-05-20T01:17:00.000-05:00

I work with such weirdos. And I'm one of them.

"Thee InCREdible ROnnie DuNN"

2011-05-17T21:44:00.002-05:00

I get a little taste of Nashville
When I see commercials for Snoqualmie Casino
It's (not) a good thing.

BTW

2011-05-17T18:44:00.002-05:00

I cut my nails. I felt it was ridiculous that I couldn't fasten the clasp when I pulled out my pearl necklace Saturday night. I thought, hmm something girly is preventing me from being girly.... Didn't make sense.

Heart sports Pain

2011-05-15T13:51:00.004-05:00

This is a difficult time in my sports fanaticism world. I've picked up the Mariners as my new love and what a roller coaster it's been. They did so well, were on a winning streak, and then they started losing close games and are now on a losing streak. I don't know why I get so invested in sports, but I do. Maybe it serves as a reality check on life? Serves to remind me that life isn't perfect and you just have to deal with it?

Also, and even more painful, Roger Federer and Rafael Nadal have been unable to beat Novak Djokovic. I do not like Djokovic, never have, and it kills me that he's not lost a match this year and even beat Nadal on clay. Nadal, who is a MASTER on clay. Ugh, things don't look good for this grand slam season. Djokovic will probably take over as world #1 very soon. Why couldn't Andy Roddick or Mardy Fish be the guy winning like DJokovic? That I would be thrilled about.

Getting back to the Mariners, their closing pitcher Brandon League has not been getting the job done and has been the main reason the team has lost the last few games. I developed a crush on him (and got approval from Nate) when he was doing well because he's just SO badass, but now he's sucking and it's just devastating. On top of the Mariner's losing, my knight in shining armor is the one putting the final nail in the coffin. Terrible.

This is so totally lame but here's a video of Brandon signing autographs that I found on YouTube. He's just hot.

Thumb Talon Strike

2011-05-14T10:04:00.003-05:00

As I was undressing last night I looked down and saw blood. My thumb talon had cut me! I felt kind of proud but also that it was a red flag for the status of my nails. It's a signal that if I was smart I would consider cutting them. But fuck that, I'm gonna keep this thing going! I'm DANGEROUS.

Sin Trinity

2011-05-10T20:11:00.003-05:00

1) I still really love Twitter. I get frustrated that there are verry few people I know in real life who are on there, but other than that, it's quite fantastic.

2) I'm STILL growing my nails out from a post weeks ago where I complained about cutting them and deciding to say "fuck it". It's crazy how long they're getting. They truly are a weapon...that I hope I won't have to use....

3) Remember how I said it would probably be a waste of time to watch baseball because there were games all the time? Nate and I have totally fallen in love with the Mariners so we watch almost every game. And they usually play 6 days a week. We've even been to two home games.

Those are the "sins" I feel like confessing at the moment. Good day.

Organically grown

2011-05-07T12:55:00.003-05:00

I really like this one. It took weeks after getting the base color and foundational structure down for me to see where it should go next. This piece has made me realize that my new way of creating art is organic, like growing them. It's such a mysterious process and helps me practice patience.

Laugh in your FACE

2011-05-03T20:33:00.002-05:00

Seth Meyers is absolutely hilarious. If you love seeing skilled comedians roast celebrities and political figures while they're in the same room, take the time to watch this.

What to do on a lovely spring day

2011-05-01T19:53:00.003-05:00

Today my allergies have been particularly bad. Of the straight up tired and puffy eyes and congestion type. Zombified. But Nate suggested we go to a park he'd been meaning to check out to take advantage of this sunny spring day. Turns out Volunteer Park has a Conservatory and we journeyed inside.

I've realized I pay more attention to plants now since the plant identification class I took for work. They're really just fascinating to look at and touch. They're alive too after all. They're trying to get through life in their own unique way, just like us humans. So I ended up being enchanted by what we saw and I took pictures...

These cacti species have a personality all their own...

This one's my favorite:

Look how big this one is! I stuck my foot in for size reference.

This one reminds me of a sunflower starfish.

Crandall Boy and the BBoys

2011-04-30T14:32:00.003-05:00

First off CONGRATS to Jen and Jayson with the birth of their son Evan Michael Crandall!!!!!!!!!!! Seriously I was so excited when I got the text from Jen I wanted to scream and jump and down and I still feel that way. I'm so happy for them!!! Marlie and Samantha now have a little BROTHER!

Now I want to direct your attention to the Beastie Boys. Go to hotsaucecommittee.com and listen to their new album Hot Sauce Committee Part 2- it will continuously stream the whole thing and it will cycle back to the beginning once it reaches the end. I suggest at least two full listens. It will be released May 3rd and from what I can tell, if you pre-order it on iTunes you get a bunch of bonus stuff along with the album. It's $15. Yes.

A little Blonde

2011-04-28T20:59:00.004-05:00

Got my hair cut again! Yeah it's only been 4 weeks but it was getting overgrown. It looks the same from the front but I got the back chopped all the way off and it looks great! AND my stylist talked me into getting a little bit of blonde. I think it looks cool.

Haha I have to show the picture I took first though. By default, I'm a teeth-barer.. RAWR!!

What I'm working on right now from where I'm sitting on the couch

2011-04-27T23:27:00.000-05:00

Holy iPhoto Sunday

2011-04-24T13:38:00.003-05:00

Well, I was going to post select pictures from how we took advantage of the spectacular weather yesterday here (hiking and Mariners game) but then I got sucked into learning more about iPhoto and subsequently discovered the edit function does not work on any of my photos. The fact that none of the fixes that were suggested online worked affected me as a brick wall along the journey of Photo.

To take a breather and get some perspective and renewed motivation on the iPhoto problem, I perused my Facebook feed. Big mistake because then all the EasterJesusSaviorGlory posts annoyed me even further. Luckily I was saved by my Twitter feed, where sarcasm and atheists run rampant and consoled myself in the Easter cards from someecards.com. Ahhhh......

Food GD Revolution

2011-04-20T01:43:00.004-05:00

I'm pissed off and flabbergasted. And so I post.

So I've kinda gotten in to the whole Twitter thing. And what I've realized is you can find out important shit going on, as told by important (to me) people, that's corroborated by other important people. Case in point, the show on ABC called Food Revolution by Jamie Oliver. I watched one episode, so faithfully recorded by my DVR, and (insert first sentence of post).

I can't even find something good on YouTube to support this, it's all blocked for whatever reason. So, it's on ABC and it's called Food Revolution. Please go out of your way to watch an episode. Thanks.

EDIT: Thanks to my friend Ashley, here is where you can go to watch the full episodes available on the ABC website.

As I step into the confessional booth

2011-04-17T14:03:00.003-05:00

Forgive me Father, for I have sinned and will continue to do so:

I pick my nose
When I meet new potential friends I talk too much about myself
I inevitably inspect my teeth every time I look in a mirror
I can make some really awesome ugly faces
I would rather watch tennis on tv than be outside communing with nature
I would like to wear the same outfit two or three days in a row and resent modern society for looking down on it
I buy in to the glamorization of drinking alcohol and live out that dream on the weekend

And finally, Deftones

2011-04-15T09:22:00.010-05:00

Before you start reading this, please click play on this YouTube window first. Let's set the atmosphere for what I'm about to talk about.

So, this video won't play if you're viewing from a mobile device, sorry.

I've loved the Deftones for ten years but have never gone to see them live because I think deep down I was afraid they would suck and it would crush me. I've heard mixed reviews of their shows through the years. Last night they played at the Paramount Theatre here in Seattle and Nate and I went.

Dillinger Escape Plan opened. Wow. I was riveted. I never got into their music because it was too, I dunno, smart for me? But seeing them live has changed things. They will be an awesome band to get to know while I'm working out and kicking ass at whatever else.

Then the Deftones came on. THEY WERE FUCKING AMAZING. And I know it was the right time to go see them in this beautiful theater. With so many albums worth of material to play. And I've posted about them before. I'll have to get links for those later (gotta go to work in like 5 minutes). AHEM THEY ARE IN FACT ONE RETRIEVABLE POST AND IT IS HERE. Anyway, I felt really privileged to know their music so well before seeing them live because it's a whole other experience live if the band's music is in your SOUL. My body moved about (even thrashed about at times) and I let it. Gotta fucking savor a live concert because they're one of the most beautiful and true and unique experiences in life.

Here's a couple pics of the show from Dave LeClair (we were on the balcony, I don't do mosh pits)

And a couple stock pictures of the venue. One large, one teensy, both necessary to properly show off this place.

I just found out this was their FIRST show on their 2011 tour, which makes me feel even more special. Also, a setlist for the show:

Tongue Sports Plant

2011-04-13T09:14:00.003-05:00

Aside from this tongue canker sore that's making daily life hilarious (really, it's not that bad, I exaggerate) what's going on with me? Well, sports for one. We have Sounders soccer and Mariners baseball. And I haven't ever really been into MLB since I was a kid watching the Braves with my brother on tv. I didn't realize they play almost every day of the week! Yowzas! So aside from thinking about what those players lives are like, I'm giddy yet worried that there's a game to watch almost every day. What an easy way to use up your time watching them. Is it admirable time spent? I think it's a bit too much. A little scary to think of watching baseball every evening after getting home from work and then there's games on the weekend. I need to get out and do other things I think.

Speaking of, I have an all day outing this Saturday to a big wildlife area north of here with my plant identification class. I'm dreading it to tell you the truth. Mainly because it's taking up my WHOLE Saturday and I have to catch a bus to get up to the meeting spot a little after 7am. On a SATURDAY. We're going up there to... wait for it... IDENTIFY PLANTS using our knowledge of the plant families garnered from the last six weeks of classes to then use a big book to figure out the identity of the plants down to genus and species. Ugh. I mean, I definitely appreciate the knowledge I've gained from the class and am definitely grateful that my work paid for me to take this class so I could do my job better when in the field, BUT I am not a plant person. I'm just not. I've noticed that I am more awed by plants now and notice them and go up and look at the flowers closely (the parts usually used to identify them) but I'm not a natural Planty. Ho hum. Just gotta get through that field trip and then the class is over.

As I look out the window, it's drizzling the Seattle drizzle. Gotta finish getting ready for work.

Tongue menace

2011-04-12T09:06:00.004-05:00

I have a fucking canker sore on my tongue. I keep reinjuring it. Which is what happens when you have to EAT.

Blogger one come in Blogger one

2011-04-10T23:47:00.003-05:00

This is my first attempt at blogging on my phone. Our Internet was down at the apartment all week, and I used it as an excuse to not blog. It was fixed Saturday and so I had all day today to create a new post but didn't. So here I am laying in bed, thumbing this out on my phone. More than anything, the Internet outage showed me just how much I COULD accomplish on my phone. It's more convenient and more personal. However, the iPhone doesn't have swype texting, as my Droid X did, and so tapping out everything is quite laborious.

I've had an idea for a post for a few days now but it's not one I could accomplish on my phone - it requires some youtube research and whatnot. Blogging purely in text is pretty limiting but I guess liberating at the same time. Heh. Okay goodnight.

TooferSunday

2011-04-03T21:39:00.000-05:00

HAIR CUT!

2011-03-31T20:56:00.003-05:00

All the pain and anguish I went through growing my hair out these 7 or so months is finally over. I just look better with shorter hair. And I feel it expresses my character better. The deal is, it's super short on one side and long on the other. Well, as long as I could stand to grow it.

Three Pictures For Sunday

2011-03-27T19:48:00.002-05:00

Started out the day trying to photographically replicate the nerd-cool person I saw in the bathroom mirror:

Nate found some new frames at Lenscrafters. These are the ones he ultimately got.

And here's my latest piece, as it hangs on the wall:

Monday in March

2011-03-21T21:36:00.003-05:00

Ah so yes, yes indeed we had our locks changed at the apartment (even the mail key) in lieu of someone perhaps having my address and keys - you were right on, Christy. My office also followed suit since I had my office keys and business cards in my purse. (if this makes no sense to you, read the previous post)

I enjoy not carrying a purse around at the moment. I've become aware of pockets again, especially ones with zippers or buttons.

Is the world getting wilder and crazier or am I just more aware of and affected by it? Japan, Libya, even flash floods in Los Angeles... I felt good making a cash donation to the Red Cross using my rewards points on my Discover card. Also that whole $10 text donation was really easy.

My nails. I hate cutting my nails. They've been growing for three weeks now maybe. They definitely make me change my typing strategy but I hate cutting them so badly and they're now getting so long that I've starting thinking "Fuck it" instead of berating myself for being lazy. Let's make this interesting and see how far I can take this, eh? If I didn't have to FILE them after cutting them I would totally do it.

I got a new iPhone since my Droid X got stolen. And honestly, it's just way better designed than the Droid. THIS time I put insurance coverage on my phone. Motherfucker cost me half the price of my iMac.

It's kinda cool having a reason to procrastinate again - my plant identification class. I need to study. Have I exhausted my procrastinating opportunities yet?